i wonder from time to time how will i survive this life. this heart of mine how long can it last. the sadness. the pain the longingness the emptiness the yearning. how long can it still beating how long till it still and nothing more nothing less. i wonder

sometimes
the feeling came back as if a greeting of an old friend
i took it as my heart signal when it's tired. so i rest it up. i refuse to give a chance to explain.  avoiding feeling is the best possible way.i know and it knows i know. we try to understand each other. as we belong to Allah and only Allah.

there is not my place to question. He is the owner He is the most benevolence. i accept it. so i swallow it. but i am also a human being. i need to work it through this heart of mine. the yearning is unbearable at time. it just kept reminding me this lonely life of mine. this sad life of mine. my dream is to be happy. a little bit happier in this sad life of mine.

i guess my heart is really tired today
my heart cannot stop crying.
i am so sorry

my heart it's empty but the heaviness is beyond anything in this world.
my heart it's silence but the scream only i can hear.
my heart it's missing someone whom i don't even know
my heart it's don't even belong to me. forgive me i can't do much.